Isolation Diaries

What brought me to write this?…company. Simply for the company. To feel like I am having a conversation with someone other then my cat. He follows me everywhere like the loyal bond people only recognise between Man and his dog. He sits and watches you contently whilst you labour on the farm, sweeping, chopping and splitting wood but runs a mile when the nasty beast that is the hoover announces its presence. Often I suggest to the cat to pick up a broom or shovel and start earning his keep. But he just licks his paws, squints his eyes and stares as if to say ‘Fuck off”. 

I thought I should start a diary to help keep me sane. After the first two weeks with horrible weather and pretty much trapped inside the house which was not the best start to self isolation, I came around to the idea that this is it. This is where I shall sleep, wake, eat, work, relax and repeat. Saying that, my last day of work was March 21st. I didn't know it was my last day. I had no idea that over night it was going to KA-BOOM. I knew I had stayed at work a week longer than I would have liked to. Being that I massage for a living and therefore in constant direct contact with people. It was a sensible but hard decision and although I had no symptoms, I have taken self isolation very seriously and want to be one less person out and about to reduce the risk of possible spreading. 

Before you envisage myself sat alone, under blankets, cuddling the cat, rocking pathetically, cracking open the wine when the noon canon fires, I couldn't be further from it. Well, apart form the wine, or gin, or espresso martini, or aperol spritz… ok I like a little tipple. I am only alone until my partner returns from work. He starts at 6am and is home by 2pm. I am aware there are far worse off people then myself but I have always read in these ‘self help’ books that you should never compare yourself to others. No persons story, experience, moment is any worse or better then someone else’s. Everyone feels things differently. So here’s my story. 

April 9th 

Day 19 

I live on a farm in the beautiful countryside of England. Kent. Surrounded by fields and other farmland. Escapism truly is an accurate word to describe it when I pull up at home in my car. Im extremely aware of how lucky I am and I  just want people to know that. I’m not someone who takes luck for granted or anything for that matter. I am a big believer in putting out positive energy into the universe and patiently waiting for good things to come. You may have to wait a few years, ten years, or maybe only a few weeks. I can honestly say this has worked for me. I remember my sister asking me “when are you two going to move in together” (we had been together only a few years at this point) Rather than answering her question, I just described my dream home, a cute little cottage in the country with no neighbours, surrounded by beautiful fields. She hugged me and told me to keep dreaming. Well I pinch myself on the daily and it appears this isn't a dream to wake from but a dream I'm truly living. So thank you Universe. 

I do however have more neighbours then I imagined I would. I live in a small hamlet. Theres about 5 houses nearby. Only one is another farm, they have animals, we have grain. But our next door neighbour (theoretically) has highland cattle…as his pets. Forget about a cat or dog, or even a cute little bunny rabbit. This 80odd year old neighbour has Scottish cows! He puts me to absolute shame. My partner says he goes for early morning jogs regularly (this is so shameful as apparently it must be so early, I am never awake to witness this myself) I didn't think 7:30am was considered a late lay-in. He has the cutest vintage tractor he still ploughs around his fields on and often cycles around the area with his grandchildren.Then theres me, lapping up the sun in the garden with an Aperol Spritz! To be honest with you. Im a Holistic Beauty Therapist and I'm most popular with massage and reflexology.. So my therapy room is often dark, lit by only one Himalayan salt lamp to create a relaxing ambiance, making it, what I like to call, a Hermit hole. After each treatment, I return to the salon reception area met by day light with me looking like Quasimodo leaving the darkness of the cathedral for the first time. So, forgive me for lounging around, but I truly am making the most of this gorgeous weather right now with hope to actually achieve a tan.

April 16th 

Day 26

I mean, you can only read so many books. You can only read for as long as your eyes will allow you too. Im on my second book already which normally wouldn’t be the case, usually it takes me a while to read anything just because its usually so busy with work, farm chores, general household domestics etc… But given the current situation I'm replacing work with reading and sunbathing - when it has chosen to be glorious that is. The books I have recently been reading are all about self help, self care, learning to live sustainably, being confident in yourself, which goes in hand with my instagram page. For years I have been an avid charity shopper and carboot bargain hunter. Many people always compliment my outfits or treasures of mine and I am always so delighted to inform them of where I got it and for how much. Im a big believer in recycling as much as possible. (I grew up with all my brothers hammy down coats, so it was pretty installed into me from an early age unknowingly). It was probably why I refused to own a coat from a young teen into my late teens. Scarred by all the nike black and red rain macs and boyish jackets, I even wore a ‘non-stylish’ I may add, Fishermans jacket. (inset screwed up face, head in hands here) This may be a hipster and edgy look now, but in the early years of secondary school-it defines you and lets you down. 

Anyway, my instagram page is simply sharing my bargain buys and my recycling tips and tricks to encourage others to try the same. If this is the only way I can make a difference to the environment, society, simple life ethics, than I shall carry on. Its amazing what you can find second hand/pre-loved/unwanted… ‘One mans trash is another mans treasure’ really does resonate with me. Funnily enough, I actually care for something more when its second hand. I don't know why, whether its more to do with not being able to replace it very easily or at all if I somehow damage it or because of the items history/back story. But I truly have more respect for my second hand treasures than any cheaply made crap from a fast fashion high street store. Fast fashion has a lot to account for with regards to the damaging impact of its industry on this planet. Our home. Having this time in isolation is proving to show the rest Mother Nature needed to boost and bounce back. Im certainly seeing it and yet I haven't left the farm in three weeks, neither do I have a TV or daily newspaper delivery. Yes I have my phone and the information is there if I want/need to check up on the world. But equally, all you have to do is stop, look outside the window, step outside if its a nice day, drink your morning coffee on your garden bench, listen to the birds and notice the increase of insects and you'll see it for yourself. These are all beautiful things that a lot of people don't have the time for or even just take for granted. Im currently writing this in the sunshine, on a pile of blankets and rugs in the garden with nothing but the bees buzzing all around, albeit a bit confused with the up and down of this weather, the birds chatting amongst themselves-probably asking if any of them have seen the cat, checking if its safe to make a quick swoop for some seeds, the neighbours cows grumbling every now and then and I can honestly say, I’m happy, I'm healthy, I'm safe and I am lucky to be here. 

So part of my farm duties, alongside my partner, are maintaining the upkeep and appearance of the farm yard. Cutting the lawns, the hedges, clearing out the gutters, watering all the plants, helping my partner with any big jobs that crop up, usual maintenance jobs. Granted he does the majority of the work, he has more of the right skill set for this. I usually drive the tractor with him in the man cage to lift him to high up gutters or areas of the barns that need some attention. But more then often, theres a job he needs to do where I just get to stand and hold something in place or carry things. Not going to lie, its never a dull day here. I do most of the chores around the house to compensate for my lack of helpful skills with regards to the farm work. This morning I thought I would be helpful and finish cutting the lawn(s). The self pull of the lawn mower has somehow broken, so yeah, thats my exercise done! Six empty baskets of grass cuttings later, I can now enjoy the…oh wait…fuck! I can now enjoy the clouds!!! 

Back indoors wrapped up since the temperature has dropped, the sun is playing peak-a-boo and the clouds have taken over the skies, I'm continuing to write this on the sofa. Boy a roaring fire wouldn't go a miss. Nope, I’ll save those logs for this evening, lighting fires during the day will only lead to getting through the log pile quicker, meaning, more wood chopping and splitting. Fair to say its on the list of farm duties this summer, to restock for next winter. I love this voice in my head talking back at me reminding me to be sensible. Yeah, So I definitely ate a dessert at 3pm today, the voice is clearly selective. 

April 2nd

Day 12

Lets take it back a bit. Two weeks ago, we ordered seeds to start to grow our own vegetables which have arrived today (I had always wanted to try this but also, who knows how long this isolation will continue for. We could all be out there with spears chasing our dinners in the unknown future). ‘Grow your own’ can really help reduce our trips to the supermarket and the time spent there. Unfortunately neither myself or my partner are very good at gardening. Cutting the lawns and trimming hedges are the limit of our capabilities. I struggle to keep even the easiest of house plants alive. But hey ho. We’ll give it a go. So our seeds finally arrive this morning. We haven't even got the right soil, we think, we’re not sure, like I said, we’re amateurs. We just know that the soil/compost, needs to be light and delicately spread over the seeds once potted so there isn't too much weight on the seed to prevent it from growing. The next thing, where do we put them? hmmm…all this time waiting for the seeds to arrive and we really haven't thought about all the other prep. The positioning of our house isn't exactly the best. We only have two East facing windows. No West facing windows. Three South facing windows and one North facing window…so this is going well. The best place would be our porch which is east facing, however the sun leaves the porch from 12ish so then actually doesn't get the sun for the rest of the day. (insert great idea face here). Nearly two years ago the old sash windows of the farm house were replaced and the old ones were kept and have been stacked in a barn since. So what did we do with them? Make a mini green house of course. This is where my avid recycling persona kicks in. Sustainability at its best. Rather than chucking the windows, adding unnecessarily into landfill, they were kept for that rare occasion of “don’t throw them, we might need them one day”. Well this time it actually justified keeping hold of ‘junk’. We screwed together four windows and made the top one a lid so we could open and close it easily to access the plants. Now we have our very own mini greenhouse. Its easy for me to say this, to utilise unwanted rubbish and upcycling things from what is lying around the farm. But old sash windows-any windows, glass panels, even perspex can be found lying around a scrap yard. If you are thinking of doing this, now or in the future, think about ways you can make a greenhouse rather than opening the laptop and shopping online. Especially if you have the skillset and accessibility to create something like this from your own home.  

Next, where shall we put the vegetable plants once they start coming through? Where shall be their permanent resting place? The one and only patch of lawn that gets the longest amount of sun in a day is right where a large area of grass didn't grow, a huge mud patch, which we seeded to grow grass in the first year we moved onto the farm. In hindsight, we should have just left it because now my partner doesn't want to put all that effort to waste by destroying the grass again. Alongside our lawn is a strip of concrete, big enough should a tractor need to get through and into the field behind our garden (this has never been the case) that field is rented by the neighbour for his cows. The other side of this concrete strip is the cattle barn. Used as an oversized garage essentially (Its like Narnia of all attics). This length of the barn and the strip of concrete gets the sun all day. So this is where we want to make our vegetable patches. In raised beds. We utilised some unwanted stackable crates my partner retrieved from his work and made legs to stand them at a good height. This is where all the fun is-doing the robot with the drill. Does anyone else remember that advert? Two guys decorating a room and one asks for the other to pass a beer. He’s holding the drill and pulls the trigger as he bends down to pick up the bottle, then starts the robot!… well, you can see me doing this more than often when I’ve got hold of the drill. Not always helpful when you just want a job done. 
All we had left to do was to order soil, compost and lining for the raised beds. Things are starting to come together. 

April 10th

Day 20 

Let the decorating commence! We’ve already given a little TLC to the entrance hallway. A much required lick of paint which now matches the kitchen. But what I’m talking about here is actually my treatment room. The smallest bedroom could have either been a very small guest room, an office (which neither of us need) or as my partner keeps suggesting, a dinning room. I just cant see it myself. It’s too closed off to be a dinning room. But no, since we moved in I ‘shot gun’ it for my massage couch and to turn it into my treatment room. Ross has the workshop for his car collection and other bits and bobs, so I think its only fair I have this one little room. I really have only been treating family and friends to start with as it wasn't exactly professionally set up. The carpet was a horrible dirty red and very old and the walls were grubby, marked and cracked in a few places. So it’s been a long time coming. Two years ago I bought some wood laminate flooring off of facebook market. Someone was selling 4 packs that they had over bought when having their kitchen done. We worked out the maths and 4 packs would be just enough for my treatment room. Waste not want not. My recycling persona kicks in and wins again. Before lockdown happened and luckily just in time, we checked what paint we already had in the workshop incase we needed to do DIY shop. I said I had wanted to paint the room a pale shade of grey. White, although simple and neutral-always a winning colour, wouldn't have that treatment room feel and might make the room feel too cold. Just by luck, we found a tub of grey paint (thank you universe) It was a few shades too dark so all we needed to get was a tub of white paint and mix it until we achieved the right shade I was after. My partner wasn't too sure of the whole room being grey so we compromised and opted for two grey two white. Just incase it no longer stays my treatment room but becomes something else. i.e a guest room. Oooooh, or a walk-in wardrobe. 

Why am I compromising when its essentially my room I hear you saying? This is probably my strongest and go to key piece of advice for anyone in any relationship. Be it partnership, marriage or just friendship. Compromise! Actually I have three, the three C’s, but that is what I believe to be the most vital. There’s Compromise, Communication and Care. I have asked my partner to help me decorate my treatment room and we’re spending the bank holiday weekend doing it, finally. Although I am off work and a bank holiday weekend literally means nothing to me right now, my partner is still working as he is an essential worker, so its a big ask of him to do this now. But like he said, if we don't get it done now then who knows when it will actually get done in the future. See, compromise. It works both ways. Always communicate with each other even about the little things and have a care! We've been together 11 years this year, so my own advice must be working. 

Whilst sanding down the door of my treatment room ready for a fresh lick of paint, I had another idea to upcycle one of those sash windows. There are still several left. So I chose one, smashed all the glass out (safely I may add) spent forever removing the putty, stripped it of the old paint using this amazing eco-friendly paint stripper and gave it a good sanding. Its amazing how all this and a fresh coat of paint can drastically change things. 

We emptied my treatment room cluttering up the spare room, making way for the DIY to begin. First we sanded the wood skirting, hoovered and wiped the walls. Not all before receiving a face time from my Aunty who lives in Australia and wants a chat, glass of wine in hand, whilst the kids are spending the day with their father for his birthday. Impeccable timing, only because now I want a glass of wine. This isolation has me ready for “Hello, my name is Ami and I'm an alcoholic, also an agoraphobic”.  

Once the carpet was ripped up I couldn't believe how much bigger it felt. Goes to show you can certainly have too much crap. By the end of the day we had achieved two coats on the skirting and two coats on the walls. Its hard to see where you’ve missed when the wall starts to dry and you haven't quite finished yet. Starts to make you go a bit doo-la-ley. So what do you do? Reward yourself with that long awaited glass of vino blanco to enjoy in front of the fire…because although its been beautiful weather, the temperature certainly drops by 7pm. 

April 12th

Day 22

My treatment room is now…finished! besides some beading for around the skirting and a more suitable light shade, its basically done. Thanks to my amazing partner for helping, I don't think I would have finished it, not only as quickly but as well without him. 

The flooring is in, the walls look great, the bed is back in and I cant believe how much bigger it feels. Slowly I have gone through all my draws and eliminated what I don't really want going back in there. Theres nothing like having a good clear out. The easiest way of doing it is creating piles. Things to keep, things to sell or donate and things that probably just need binning (make sure the items to be binned will eventually decompose, nothing worse then clogging up landfill). The process of elimination can be quite rewarding. There were so many items in my treatment room that no longer suited the new style. Which means, its very minimal in there now, thus allowing for some new items, albeit not going mad and cluttering up what I’ve just spent de-cluttering, but to simply re-add some character. Such as that sash window I started to upcycle. Once finished, we screwed it to the wall in my treatment room and it has now become a shelving unit to display all my nail varnishes’ for clients to choose from. They are a lot more visible now than when they were just in a draw all bunched together. Im so proud of this idea and hope it inspired others to see what they can upcycle from old junk lying around. Other options could have been small apple crates, tree trunks thinly sawn to make floating shelves maybe? or scaffolding boards. Depends what look you are going for. 

I couldn't be happier with my room now and already it feels so much more professional. I can now no longer be embarrassed of the walls and dirty carpet. I might even treat myself to a nice uniform to wear just for treatments at home. Its amazing how being stuck at home, staring at all the things that bug you, seeing all the annoying imperfections eventually cracks you and gives you the motivation you need to put things in action. Makes me sound lazy when you think of life before this lockdown. 

My partner and I are putting all this effort into our home because we want to enjoy the environment we spend our time in. Some people think were mad for ploughing money into the house when we don't own it. But, we're here for a while and actually, getting to the nitty gritty of it, we’re not spending that much money at all. Our kitchen for example, after spending a year staring at yellow walls and black vinyl tiled flooring, with an unrealistic amount of work space, we decided to go for it. Everything, from new flooring, work surface, kitchen units, butler sink, appliances etc… only cost us £900 and then roughly 2 weeks, if that, of our time. When you make a committed investment, don't think about the short of it. But the lasting quality and the enjoyment of it. We bought second hand appliances and kitchen units and the labour was once again mainly my partner but I certainly helped where I could. Yes we wont have a warranty, but we bought good quality brands. Our kitchen is now 3 years old and still looks brand spanking new! Don't have those kind of skills or abilities? Some things even my partner had to jump on Youtube to check out and it doesn't hurt to get a second opinion. Every time someone comes to our home and compliments the kitchen I am so proud to say that Ross installed it! Also that its all second hand, minus the work surface and flooring (another score for the recycling persona). Now its far more enjoyable to sit for breakfast at the kitchen table, lunch when friends are over or dinners - if not snuggled in front of the fire. You just can't put a price on that. 

April 18th

Day 28 

Apparently its Saturday! I wouldn't know, I have no idea what day it is anymore. I cant go to work, I cant work from home, I haven't really fitted a structure into my daily isolation life yet. Im just taking each day as it comes, making the most of the sunshine when its nice, cleaning indoors when its not and writing this diary when farm chores aren’t being done. So even though I'm at home with no where to go, there is actually a lot I can be doing at home/on the farm. I have found sitting in the office of the farm the best place to write. I have great views of the yard and our back garden (its ultimately like a conservatory) and I can keep an eye on whats happening, see people on their daily exercise missions (putting me to shame once again) See the cows in the field behind our garden but also, I think its important to work in an environment equipped and set up for its suitability. Having an area like this will prevent you from “Oh well I'm not going anywhere I’ll be seen, so i’ll just stay in my pyjamas and sit in bed with the laptop, or maybe ill move to the sofa”. Your bed is for relaxing and switching off, the sofa is for chilling, the kitchen is a place for eating and in our house-socialising. Make sure you keep separate from these spaces. So you can enjoy them when you are not working. 

Today has been filled with farm duties, after a slow ascend from bed and finally a cooked breakfast that turned out to be more lunch time. Jobs were done on the farm. I can never be serious when we do this work. I like to have a sing song-much to my partners delight, or a little silly dance for some self entertainment. What can I say…its been a month since I've been at work. Nay, out in the public at all!! Although this doesn't really justify it, I’m pretty much like this anyway. We trimmed a bush that was basically becoming a tree and added more stuff to burn in the farm trailer. Tomorrow, de-weeding and picking up fallen twigs. They make for great kindling for the fire. We collect them up and store them in the barn to dry out. It makes sense to utilise them for this. What doesn't make sense are people who go out to chop a tree down to then turn into kindling. I guess that’s just my way of thinking though. Trying to reduce unnecessary damage as much as possible. Our logs we get from out of the fields from trees that have fallen down naturally. Plenty come down in the winter months from high winds, usually because they are old and tiring. 

Currently I am in the spoken about office writing this entry and my partner has come charging through the porch, steel pipe in hand and a chimney sweep stuck through it. I bought him (second hand off ebay I like to add) an Ooni pizza wood fired oven. Its been the best gift I think I've given him ever! Anyway, he’s charged through the porch, Dick-Van-Dyck style singing ‘Chim-Chim-Iney’ I have no idea what he’s doing but I felt it was something I needed to share as it made me chuckle a lot. 

After farm chores, we made some time to spend together baking cakes. He made what I can only imagine to be an amazing beetroot and chocolate brownie cake, recipe by his own sister (you wont like this, but, I don't like chocolate flavoured things…Told you). I made my famous banana loaf, its easy, its simple, doesn't use a lot of ingredients and tastes so yummy! A recipe I love and have adapted myself. Please, give it a go. 

Banana loaf of dreams: 

Serves 12. Prep time 20 minutes. Cook time 1 hour. 

175g plain flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon bicarbonate soda

125g unsalted butter (I prefer to use goats butter as its much creamier)

150g golden caster sugar

2 large eggs (or 3 small)

2 lid cap fulls of vanilla extract (one tea spoon)

Handful of dried Cranberries and Saltanas (I never put in a specific amount, so put in how much you want and whatever you want. Sometimes I put walnuts in too).

2 large very ripe bananas and 1 for decorating

Walnuts for decoration (amount to liking)

First, preheat the oven to 180C, fan 160C, gas mark 4. Butter the loaf tin and lightly dust with flour. 

In a bowl add the flour through a sieve so its nice an airy, add the bicarbonate of soda and baking powder. Set aside. 

In a separate bowl, beat the banana (an electric whisk is easiest and gets it really smooth) add the vanilla extract. 

In another bowl mix together the butter and sugar (make sure the butter has been out a while so it is more pliable. Then add the eggs one at a time. I do this whilst I'm using an electric whisk. Add the banana. 

Add the flour gradually through a sieve to catch even more air. This is how it gets very light and spongy. Most recipes say to fold it in with a wooden spoon but I actually still use the electric whisk on the lowest setting. 

Then chuck in your added ingredients. I very much favour the dried cranberries every time. 

Decorate with sliced banana, lengthways or width ways its totally up to you. Then I like to sprinkle with crushed walnuts. 

Put in the oven for 55 minutes. 

I check with a knife at 55 minutes to see if it is cooked and usually just keep it in for another 5 minutes if not. 

Remove and place on a cooling rack. Then, enjoy!!! 

March 25th

Day 4

The weather, although quite windy, is rather sunny and beautiful. Isolation/lockdown may seem like a scary thing, also depending how long it goes on for so I’m just taking this moment to enjoy a good book with the sun on my face, albeit wrapped in a coat but still warm and cosy. Moments like these are rare and those fortunate enough to be home, safe, not knowing anyone taken by the virus should consider themselves and this time given to them with appreciation. I am a self employed Holistic Beauty Therapist, I can not work from home, I am not making any money during this time but I am so thankful that I am home, safe and healthy. It has certainly had a knock on effect to those future plans that I have but currently, time is not of the essence. How often have I heard someone say “there are just not enough hours in the day” or “I wish I had more time to get stuff done at home” well, this is that time, this is that opportunity. As hard as it may be to stay home completely, If its the only way I can help, then that is what I shall do. My partner is a key worker, so he is still continuing on a slightly normal routine. As he is still going out and about he is doing our essential shopping for us. It’s going to be hard not leaving the farm, but I consider myself very fortunate to be in a position to have all this space to wonder. Activities/farm chores to keep busy and a soon to be vegetable garden to tend to daily. 

Whilst reading my book in the garden, wrapped in my coat, with my sunglasses on. I heard such a commotion of birds from the cattle barn that I had to go see what on earth was going on. Low and behold, several ducklings were trying to follow their mum who had decided to climb a large hay stack, most likely for safety purposes, but the little ducklings really struggled to climb after her. You can only picture it now, me running after them, one by one, collecting them up to reunite with their mother. Ducklings not knowing which way to run, me flailing my arms all around, trying to catch them quickly without hurting them. ‘Oh, its a farm life’. 

Once that chaos was over and they were all nesting with their mother on the hay stack. I went to make another hot drink. After wasting a tea bag (in this precious times) I decided to have just a cup of hot water with a slice of lemon and a spoon of honey. Mmmmmm! I looked at the seeds I removed from the lemon slice and thought to myself if I could grow my own lemon plant. A quick search on google and a few youtube videos, I thought it couldn't hurt. 

. Firstly, remove as many seeds from a lemon as required. The bigger the seed the better. Dry them on a piece of kitchen towel. 

. They have a very thin skin on them, carefully remove this skin which should peel away delicately. 

. Slightly dampen a kitchen towel and in one line, place the seeds thumb width apart to give them space. fold the kitchen towel ruler width at a time until folded into a square and wrap in clingfilm making sure no air is trapped inside. 

. Place in a warm dark place for a week. (I put mine in the boiler cupbard). 

. In a week when you remove them from the wrapping, you should start to see the seed opening and a stem starting to protrude).

Fingers crossed something happens. 

Its amazing what little ideas and possibly new ideas come to you when you're taking time out. I said it before and i’ll say it again. Take yourself outside, into your garden, a park bench, the wall running along the sea front. Listen to everything thats around you. This is such a great time to do this for the sake of hearing the nature around you as there is minimal traffic around polluting the sounds around us. But also for our mental well-being. You know that feeling when you've been trapped in a room with chemicals or in a stuffy bedroom, a smelly gym, then you go outside and give your lungs a full tank of fresh air! Well, your mind needs the same. So allow it some fresh air. 

April 27

Day 37

This morning was beautiful. I am very much starting to enjoy my morning cup of tea on the bench outside in the sunshine. Its becoming the thing I get excited about when the evenings draw in. ‘Oooh, its getting dark, the temperatures dropping, soon it’ll be bed time and then I can wake up and have my morning tea with the sun on my face’! (Isolation really has got me excited about the smallest of things) but don't dismiss them as non-important. These moments are very important and make us appreciate the nature of life. 

I started today with my morning cup of tea out on the garden bench, Morrey came and joined me, curling up next to my legs after failing to sit on me of which I wasn’t ecstatic about as it was far too hot for a fur-ball on my lap. Clouds rolled over and a sky of greyness was looming over the neighbours fields. However, I set my yoga matt up outside under the gazebo as I was joining my sisters online pilates class to try out. I thought how lovely it would be to enjoy the breathing and stretching outside in the fresh air…well, it was lovely to start, it was nice and cool, but then the clouds cleared and the sun came out beaming in all its glory, baking me/frying me like an egg sizzling on burning hot concrete! Flies were out in their packs, a bee came too close for comfort, my parasol kept blowing away instead of sheltering the skin of my ‘English Rose’ face! someone turned up to hand deliver a letter from the council…Although beautiful weather, it was hard work. So maybe next time, i’ll do it indoors. The class itself was really great. I can’t believe I have left it until now, during this time of lockdown, to have done one of her classes. I used to go to a class that was yoga, pilates and ti-chi all in one and I loved it. But due to a bad time at work, my motivation was depleting, I had no energy, not even to crack a smile half the time which just left me feeling completely drained. Long story short, I got out of that work environment moving to another salon and I couldn't be happier now. So, now, during this time of lockdown, this isolation, I have to force myself to have the motivation, the get and and go, otherwise I could just do myself no favours and sulk on the sofa. I didn't hold back, luckily having had the previous experience I was able to know what moves to do from her explaining rather than watching the screen. I honestly hadn't worked my core so much for a long time! I knew I would be feeling it the next day. I filmed myself so I could check my positioning and posture. It didn't look like I worked that hard but I can tell you, I did. My abs already hurt. But I can honestly say, it made me feel good and proud of myself. 

April 19

Day 29

Our seeds are looking great! The courgettes have leaves coming through. The cucumbers are following closely behind, the Tomatoes are starting to show through. It’s just the sweet peppers that aren't showing sign of anything right now. My lemon seeds are doing great! Which is good to know all that effort and the week waiting for them to ‘do their thing’ in the boiler cupboard wasn't a waste of time. We managed to get hold of some more soil (the right kind of soil) from a local farm shop my partner popped to after he finished work. He went in for some fresh produce, onions, potatoes, carrots etc… then left with more than bargained for. Feeling so grateful for these lovely little local shops, boutiques, independent business’s. For one, because I work in one myself, but also because you simply should want to help the ‘little man’. Most of the local farm shops around us support charities and our nearest one has a team of young adults with learning difficulties that they support by having them work there, setting up art classes for them, teaching them how to work in the kitchen of the tea room, the garden centre etc… So this is why I like to support the local small businesses. 

 Soon I can move my lemon seed plants to bigger pots (people will be getting lemon plants this Christmas) like wise with the courgettes, before moving them to the raised beds. All the other plants are still a bit behind. However, no one can say we haven’t tried and I look forward to enjoying our vegetables when they are finally ready to eat. Depending on the success of this time, may change how many we try and do again next year. Perhaps we should start with just two plants and perfect those before trying to grow our own large selection. Time will tell. 

Although the weather is lovely at the moment, it’s still a bit up and down. Occasionally cloudy, burst of sun, bit of a breeze, a day of rain, the blankets are coming in and out more than a jack in the box. Im enjoying reading out in the sunshine whilst I can, soaking up as much vitamin D as possible. Hoping to achieve some kind of a tan on my pasty white legs if at all possible. Nothing makes me happier then lounging on a pile of blankets, in a summer dress, reading a book, ice coffee in hand. I think the sunshine would make anyone much happier right now. It definitely lifts my spirits. 

June 8
Day 79

Well I have had a busy month. Lots of farm duties to get done and sunbathing to enjoy, books to read and cooking to be done. Not a lot of time to sit and write. Yes I could be writing instead of reading but I've been reading educating books. Books about sustainability and how we can help the environment. So, I set aside this to be able to educate myself further. If you look at my previous posts you will see a few books that I have talked about. They were so insightful and opened my eyes to a lot more of what goes on than I already knew. So I absolutely recommend them. 
I have continued my sisters pilates classes, although not as many a week as I hoped to be doing. Starting the morning with good exercise and stretching has been so good for me. For my back particularly. Having somewhat of a sedentary lifestyle-yes I'll admit it, I don't really get much exercise other than my job and going up and down the stairs at work like a yoyo. A habit I have become aware of is such a simple thing we wouldn't even consider a problem, but I have always crossed my legs when sat. Something I can't even remember when I started doing it. This has most certainly caused me the start of what appears could be a varicose vein in my right leg. Having started the pilates and being conscious of crossing my legs (right now I have slapped my wrist and uncrossed my legs from under the desk tutting at my poor efforts already) This is starting to have an effect. Either that or because I actually have a slight tan on my legs now from being able to be outdoors so much during this lockdown period, which has enabled to hide the early stages of varicose veins. My back feels so much stronger too. I often suffer with a trapped nerve in my left scapula and around the lumbar area. All I have to do is reach for something on the floor or twist in a funny way and *click* it goes. There I am, left to be still on the sofa because moving proves difficult without catching my breath away and sending a sharp pain into my shoulder blade. Honestly, anyone with any back problems should seek out a good pilates instructor, or yoga even, Ti-Chi perhaps, anything to get the blood moving and the body stretched. Being in my industry we have to take good care of our bodies and our mental state too. Keeping our backs strong, our wrists far from repetitive strain injury as possible and being able to protect ourselves from any negative energy entering the treatment room. I work in direct contact with clients, my hands heal their aliments. Skin to skin treatments can be a way of absorbing their energy and as much as I want my clients to feel comfortable with me, allowing them to open up and talk if thats what they need, I still need to protect myself from any negative energy floating around. I do this with a selenite wand and pretending the doorway of my treatment room is a waterfall. By waving the wand over my massage couch and around my head releasing any negative energy and washing any residue away by walking through the water fountain. Other people may relate to this, they may also have other ways of protecting themselves. But this is how I like to do it.
I do miss being at work, I miss my clients and doing the treatments so much and it looks as though I won't be back in the salon until September the earliest (insert sigh emoji). Heck, if people aren't sensible about the easing up of lockdown restrictions then we could potentially be facing a second wave, which will impact my industry even more and I could potentially not be going back to work until next year along with other like therapists. I suppose just think of the positive and hope that everyone is sensible.

Our plants are coming along nicely. Starting to see courgettes coming through, strawberry flowers coming out, the tomato plants are gaining height. My beans are climbing the bamboo canes beautifully. I woke up early-ish this morning to go and water them but heard the rain washing the bedroom window so tucked myself back up for a few more moments of peace. I don't know why I am so surprised of this typical English weather. Its June, its Kent, obviously theres going to be more rainy days then hot...right? (insert thumbs down emoji here, rain, rain clouds, grimace face). My long and hard worked for tan is starting to fade! I guess making the most of the rain can also be a positive thing. When its glorious outside, it is hard to focus on tasks at hand required indoors so when it rains, it makes it that little bit easier. Hence, here I am, typing away to my hearts content. Next, to clean and spruce up the house, maybe get my sewing machine out and alter the shirts that have been hanging with intention on the side of my wardrobe for weeks. Theres always something to do. Something to be done.